Sunday, June 12, 2011


I have barely posted on this blog for some time, now. Strangely still feels open, though. This is fitting, I think: the informing idea of this blog was to have a place to work out thought processes and theories, especially as they relate to inner work. What I neglected to think about was that this work is primarily experiential in nature and often best worked on orally, in the context of a group. So, having found myself a work group (one that is not GCNE), I've been able to do just that. I still have a notebook that gets plenty of ideas written down, but I just haven't gotten around to posting them. At the end of the day, I'm still quite prone to navel-gazing.

There is also the issue of writing about some of these things in a public forum. I am no Bennett, or Blake, or anyone that is able to easily distill extremely nuanced ideas--ideas that are traditionally presented and transmitted orally--into text. When I write or present an idea, if it is presented incorrectly, then the effort was for naught. Or, put simply, putting a flawed product out is going to cause some problems.

But wait! The point of this blog is exploration! The whole idea is to throw spaghetti at the wall. If I'm not experimenting, I'm not even trying. The real challenge is to see how this stuff works in real life. I should be able to see concepts and ideas in action, if I can conceive them. (Or, 'conception necessarily leads to perception', if it is a right concept.) As long as I can let ideas develop, instead of trying to actualize the goal that I want to see from the word 'go', then all should be well.

Fittingly, I have been quite wary, in recent days, of end-gaining. My experience with the circle's season of Sundays was that of good work finished that produced a much better result than what we had initially signed up for. One thing that did not arrive along with the extremely positive response was any sort of monetary or material gain. In fact, the total donation that we received was barely enough to cover renting the space that we used for one hour. I can count at least six other people that would not have changed that, either: that work, and all this work, was meant for our being, not for our gain.

Ayn Rand actually said something that was very true to this idea: contrary to the popular picture of Rand (which seemed to be in love with money for money's sake), she actually pointed out that money can be nothing more than a barometer. If you do what is right, then money and profit will flow. Her actual application of this idea did eventually get twisted out of shape, but the original sentiment is very much in line with the work that we did and continue to do: right action leads to right results. The true creative approach, however, is acknowledging that the right result may in fact be completely antithetical to any immediate sense of logic. But that's for another time.